Perfectly content
to hibernate indoors, hidden away from people, quietly cleaning and
organizing...Each day this week, I had to push past my comfy default to get out
of the house, meet people, speak to others... a constant renewing of
the mind to speak only positive, to move forward, seeking joy,
spreading love. It doesn't always come naturally...but any good
thing requires work. So, each day I gave myself a little pep
talk...get out there, talk, listen, share, love. Moving in the right
direction, until I owned it.
My week was looking pretty phenomenal
until the busy days closed in and I worried I had over-booked. One
event stacked after another, until the universe intervened and snow
canceled most plans leaving only the most important. I savored a
long lunch and shopping with a friend, played some killer ping-pong, cheered daughter's first sports banquet, comforted a
mourning friend, and listened as a brave friend poured out her
difficult history to a room full of young moms. I searched and found
some cute furniture to tidy up a few more piles, and helped Tim paint
more of the basement (relieved he decided to keep the color). Each
venture filled my cup, leaving me better off than I started. Hoping
that I was able to give as much as I received.
Each day was a new struggle, however.
A new opportunity to choose sadness or joy, dark or light. Not
depression, but close. However, a special someone is struggling
desperately with depression...finding it difficult each day to peel
back the covers and place her feet on solid ground. Attempting to
fill the void with food, weepy and sleepy most of the day. Your mind
and body scream stay put...fight it, sweet girl. You are meant for
more than this. Rise, find some small thing to be thankful for, put
one foot in front of the other and live. Don't merely exist. Make
connections, find something that brings you joy, breathe, pray, move.
This, too, shall pass.
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