Choosing Joy

Sleepy eyes this morning, wanting a few more minutes, scanning the body to check the level of plant-pulling soreness, confirming tight hips.  Mentally adding yoga to the morning to-do. Feet hit the carpet, I cut in line for the bathroom, feeling successfully sneaky.  Dog fed, door opened for his own morning bathroom break. Fruit and veggies chopped and juiced for some morning hubby health.  Made with love to supercharge his cells, sending extra doses of love to heal what ails. Kisses, then back upstairs for some morning yoga and reading. 

Checking emotions, finding myself tapped out, empty, not the typical overflow of joy.  How to fix that… what to add or take away? Finding stillness and listening, head cocked awaiting insight. Write.  Ok…I get it, deep thoughts, deeper meanings flow with the tapping, so I make the tea, I grab my spot and begin to tap. 

The endless flurry of to-dos sit poised at my right, my fingers make the words that echo deep within instead. Easier to attack the list, but I crave the harder mental work, the busyness can wait. That joy I crave cannot be bought or busily accomplished…it’s perched just out of reach, awaiting the stillness.  Waiting for me to cease the strive, waiting for me to ditch the worry, waiting for me to trust. It’s the sweetest thing. And there it sits, inching closer, happy anticipation of it’s arrival. Plopping the worry in a basket by the door, I sit some more. Joy so close I can taste it…the most decadent chocolate can not compare. 

Joy, she spills, overflows, seeps out in every direction, touching tasks, setting gaze, moving hands, pepping steps. Joy, she lifts above the mundane, above current worry, above long cast vision.  Joy so rich, so abundant, she holds nothing back, ready to spill. It’s the fix I need… the infusion of joy that shifts my perspective. 

Then, the steady tapping brings awareness… has Joy been there all along, my busy worry crowding her shine? A wealth of joy right under the surface…diamonds and pearls ready to adorn, yet reaching for plastic instead.  Joy is a choice.  Not the fickle addition to a lucky day.  Requiring the stillness, a dose of gratitude and a deep, saturating dive…so that every thought, every sight, every word is infused with honest to goodness Joy. Nothing else compares…no other replacement satisfies. Another body check, the hips are loose, emotions are lighter, the pep has returned, Joy resumed. Today, I choose Joy.