The Sweet Comfort of No

Years and years of Yeses is now revealing to me the sweet comfort of No.  If there is a task to accomplish, a seat to fill, a desperate vacancy, without much consideration, I was your girl.  Rallying the troops, encouraging and organizing was my jam. Plates were spinning wildly in every direction.  It was so easy to give, give, give then come home exhausted with nothing left in the tank for the ones that need my love the very most.

Slowly plucking away all the weeds…tasks that weren’t adding joy to my soul, that didn’t serve a purpose in the world or my life. Then deeper and more difficult, I considered what remained. Was I meant for this? Was it bringing me great joy? Just because I was good at something, it didn’t necessarily mean I was the girl for the task.  Am I committed only for the friendship, notoriety, or sheer busyness? Out it went.

What remained was The Best Yes…those core commitments that I’m meant for, those things that deserved my absolute best. Free from everything extra, now able to dedicate time and love to those things that needed it the most….the really excellent things.

What I also found in saying No was that very quickly an even more qualified person filled the position. I was holding her spot inadvertently all along. Saying No feels really, really good and surprisingly, people don’t hate me for it.  What remains is a more concentrated, more dedicated version of me….and I kinda like her.