Update 2

My head hurts, my heart is heavy. I’m exhausted and it’s late so I’ll get right to the update.  Mom was admitted to the hospital on Sunday and they give her till Christmas.  Five short days.  Just one hand full.  We’re down one day.  Unless you count Sunday, then we’re down two.  They are “buffing and polishing” her with five different fluids in an effort to juice her up so she can enjoy Christmas at home.  Today was much better than yesterday…she’s on the upswing so it appears that the buffing is working.  She was quite hilarious today…apparently a side effect of faulty organs is being loopy…I’m glad she’s happy and not any of the alternatives.  Counting my blessings.  Jody commented that she looked like she was tanning (her skin a lovely jaundiced yellow) to which she replied, “no, just yellowing”. 

In her emaciated state, and in true Linda-style, she is the one offering comfort to us.  Her faith is making this transition so much easier for me.  She knows in the split seconds afterwards that she will instantly be in the presence of God and reunited with her mother, her father, and her sister.  When I added that she might even get to meet the child she lost between my birth and Bryan’s, she commented, “It might be the Good one”.  Her wonders never cease.

I am overwhelmed at the sheer number of loved ones that have reached out to me and my entire family.  Hugs given, pictures shared, milk shakes delivered, transportation offered, meals provided, tears shed, hands held, texts sent, calls left, messages written, dog walked.  I’m used to being the one that gives love…it’s strange and wonderful to receive it.  

I have become the rock…Mom’s power somehow transferred to me.  When the doctor delivers news, I’m the one he focuses on.  When family members need an answer, they come to me.  When mom says, “What’s new”, the entire room swings to wait for my answer.  Mom requests funeral arrangements and songs to be sung, dictates her medical wishes and I complete them diligently.  I’m quite honored to give her this one last gift to know I’ll do my best to get it done.  But sometimes, I just want to hide in the closet with my crayons.  

Not sure how long the “buffing” will take..not sure if she’ll “polish” enough to come home.  Hoping I’m wrong.